Monday, March 15, 2010

Dreaming with a broken heart

I have a dream that one day I can return as a normal human being. Maybe you will feel wired and wonder that I am a normal human being why I have such dream. Yes, like others I am a normal human being but I can not live as a normal human being. That’s real dark and disturbing. Presently I am not “Want” in Canada but I am under public eyes and ears in Canada; my life details are under tremendous trouble; I can not exercise my fundamental human rights, such as “free speech”……So, what’s the point of life or what’s the meaningful of life? The outrage is that so many agents/parties work together to force me, a vulnerable civilian to the dead-end in despicable ways, even my closed friends and family members. How? They have collected all my related personal information and exchanged it to create every barrier in my life, even abused their expertise and professional ethics to fool me because they assume I do not know. After that, they just simply deny or say “do not know”. Is it not disturbing? How can I fight with two powerful evil governments-China government and Singapore government, and with so-called think-tanks, meritocracies, intelligent agents and scoundrels around me?
Internet gives people many advantages and convenience. But the person who invented it thought about unauthorized spying, malicious programs, virus etc. Now we live in this highly civilized Internet age but it is worse than that in “Stone age”. In “Stone age”, life was simple but it was peaceful. People shared the resource and trusted each other. But now in this “Internet age”, who can be 100% trusted in this world? I do not know anyone read about famous Russia novel titled Integrity. One gentleman was searching for integrity which actually is basic human behavior. But he could not get it. It is really heart-braking. Did he demand too much? No credibility, what’s the meaning of life? Saying everything or doing everything is under doubt or under question, what are you feeling? That’s the human cost---high but unnecessary cost. People must verify credibility at multi-levels. It takes time and effort; another dark human nature is war. The resource is limited; we have only one earth, which deserves the resource they have? That’s why the incessant wars in the world; environment, all countries agree that the environment is very important to this planet but no one wants to commit practically but blames others…..

Therefore, so many years civil liberty, is it moving forward or lagging behind?

I have a dream that one day I can exercise my right of “free speech” to publish my second book called ; I have a dream that one day I can get justice to clear my name and reputation and hope that every one is equal in front of justice regardless how powerful and how evil two governments are; I have a dream that people are honest each other, respect each other and care each other, no lie, no plot, and no scheme; I have a dream that like this year 2009, it is only the celebration of freedom of 20 years of “The fall of Berlin wall” instead of the protest of 20 years of “The massacre of Tiananmen Square”; And finally, no CIA, no CSIS, no any spying agents/parties in any countries, human being can live peacefully in this global community. Maybe you will say I am too greedy because I have so many dreams. Well, actually I have only one dream---to be a normal human being. Maybe it is just a dream which never comes true but I still have a hope and I am still searching.

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